Wooden ear 5

  Mugwort ear 5

  When I woke up, I found myself lying in Baba's home.

  Bara's arm was holding a cat. A very fat cat, with a long white tail, lying quietly in Bara's arms. The green pupils were shining brightly, but the face had an expression of being stuffed full.

  Ba La hugged the cat and looked at me with affection, saying: "Little Ears, fortunately you're okay."

  "What about Xu Yi?" I suddenly thought of.

  "He's fine," said Ba La, "there's a wound on your head, I've bandaged it for you, what should you say when you get home?"

  I won't say anything.

  "You can stay at my place for a while," she said.

  I crawled over from her bed to the mirror placed on the other side of the bed and saw a detestable white gauze stuck on my head. I pulled it off with force, which made me wince in pain. "Ba la" shrieked at the top of her voice: "What are you going to do?"

  I said to Baba: "I need to use the restroom."

  He stretched out his hand and pointed in the direction.

  I endured the pain, cleaned my bloody hair with cold water in the bathroom, and then combed my hair. I ran outside and asked: Is there a suitable hat for me to wear?

  There were a lot of hats, but I tried on almost ten before finding one that was barely wearable. It was a small red hat, and Ba La said it was the one her little niece had left at her house.

  Ba La saw me off all the way to the front of the ramen shop. She said to me: "Little Ears, you are even braver than I am, I want to learn from you."

  "That child..." I asked her.

  She patted her belly mysteriously and said, "Don't worry, I'll give birth to him."

  I covered my mouth.

  "It may hurt a little, but it's worth it."

  "Doesn't your mom care about you?" I asked her.

  He curled his lips and said, "Can't control it anyway."

  "Don't be reckless," I said. "What's the benefit of doing it this way?"

  Look at me.

  "Bala, don't be like this, I know you actually don't like it this way." I said, then turned around and left Bala with big strides.

  When I turned back, I saw her standing still in the same place. Seeing me turn back, she put her hand to her lips and threw a flying kiss, then she turned around and walked away.

  I went home with that strange little red hat. My mom looked at me strangely, and I rubbed my hands together as I walked to my room: "It's really cold today, I bought a hat, it feels much better."

  Those days, I had a strange idea.

  I suddenly want to be bad.

  I'm suffocating and I stubbornly believe that only when things get worse can I gain freedom.

  I wrote another long passage of nonsense on my blog, and after finishing it, I hoped someone would read it. So, I sent the address of my blog to Ba La's mailbox. Ba La quickly replied to me. She said: "Little Ears seems unhappy, why don't you come to 'Whatever' and listen to me sing?"

  "No way," I said. "But I'll go to the riverbank this afternoon to read."

  That afternoon, I held a book and sat on the wooden chair by the river, pretending to read. Baba finally arrived, wearing a dress with long flowing tassels, carrying a rose-red bag, walking towards me with exaggerated steps, staring at me with bright eyes and asking: Muzi'er, do you really, really want to become a bad girl?

  I nodded heavily with a silly expression.

  Her hand slapped loudly on my head.

  "I'm going to die," Ba La said, "Daydreaming all day!"

  Ba La couldn't help but laugh again, she said: "Little Ears, promise me one thing."

  "Huh?"

  "When my son is born, you'll be his godmother. So you mustn't become a bad person, I want my son to have a good mother, so he won't lose out to others!"

  "What are you talking nonsense about!" I pulled her with all my might and said, "Come with me!"

  "Where are you going?"

  "Go to the hospital!"

  "Let me go!"

  "No!" I said, "You have to go to the hospital, you must go!"

  She pushed me away, sat down on the wooden chair with a smile and said: "Little ears, listen carefully. Even if everyone in the world wants to kill this child, I will still give birth to him. This point will never change, unless I die!

  I was startled by Barla's smile and it took me a long time before I could say: "Barla, what is the point of all this?"

  She put her chin on the wooden chair and said slowly: "You won't understand, just like you can never become a bad kid. Little ears, everyone's fate is determined from the day they were born, you are a good girl, so you can only be a good girl for your whole life, do you understand?"

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