I sat in a stunned silence for a moment, unable to take in or give information, trying to process everything I had just been given. There was so much to unpack, so much information presented and some bombshells between the lines that I felt needed answers. I decided to start with the broadest question I had first, one that I felt was the least pointed and easiest to answer.

  “What do you mean, fix things? Like, you want me to be a superhero or something? Rush in and save the day when people need my help?” I asked, a sarcastic tone to my voice.

  “More or less, yeah,” she responded, not an ounce of levity in her voice. She was as serious as she had ever been. I matched her gaze, her fiery orange eyes, and swallowed hard.

  “So, what I did to that man, was that… was it what you had in mind?” I was confused, as when I told her, she had seemed ambivalent about the actions themselves, and more concerned about my own well-being. But now that I knew what she wanted, it felt strange, her tepid reaction.

  “Well, I don’t want you to savagely beat people who are weaker than you; there are police officers and law for that. When you found out what you did, the proper response would’ve been to get evidence and report it to the police. I could teach you how to do that, since you have the capacity for magic. Go invisible, sneak into his house, get what you need, and leave, if it bothered you that much.” She spoke with a slight indifference to her voice, a tone that made a small fire rise in the back of my throat.

  “You didn’t see what I saw, Silaqui,” I responded, a low growl underneath my sultry voice. “This man, he’s the kind that hides the bruises under clothes. He’s the kind that puts on a smile when CPS comes to the door. I could feel it. I am not leaving that in anyone’s hands but my own.”

  Silaqui looked at me, and I could see her expression change to one of sincerity. “Hey, hey, it’s okay Avery. Look, I’m sorry. I was imagining you saving entire cities with your power, helping thousands… I guess it slipped away from me for a moment, the dire importance of one innocent life. You were right to do what you did. I’m sorry.”

  I took a deep breath, and relaxed my posture. “It’s okay Silaqui. I know what I did wasn’t the best, but it’s all I know. But how am I supposed to save an entire city, Silaqui? Am I even capable of that?”

  She looked at me, a small concern in her brow, before responding. “Honestly, I don’t think so. The others I made were beings of exceptional power. Your ability is far beyond a human’s, and greater than the average Folk, but it’s still not enough to change anything major. Maybe the best course of action is to be an everyday kind of hero, then; stop what you can stop, and let what is above you go.”

  I thought about it for a moment, before a memory flashed into my mind: the feeling after the bubble of evil in my belly popped inside Silaqui’s flat, how the raw power flooded my veins, and how I felt capable of doing anything I wanted.

  “What if I ate someone’s Vanta on purpose?” I asked, with determination in my voice. “In the moment after I consumed it fully, I felt capable of doing impossible tasks. We could try and see if that would allow me to do what you wanted.”

  “We can’t do that,” Silaqui answered immediately, a concern in her voice. “I saw how that made you feel, how horrific that was for you. To make you do it on purpose… That seems like torture. I can’t allow you to do that, Avery. Not just because you might hurt someone again, but because you will definitely hurt yourself.”

  I sat there for a moment, unsure of how to respond, before simply nodding. I wasn’t sure what the right thing to do was, and I only wanted to help this person who had helped me so much, but maybe she was right; maybe torturing myself wasn’t the way forward this time. I felt powerless in my inability to do what SIlaqui truly wanted me to do, to save things and help people like my parents would’ve always wanted. This in itself was torture, this knowledge that even with the help of such a powerful being, I still wasn’t good enough. Maybe I’d never be good enough, for Silaqui, for my parents, for Aera, for my grandfather, or for myself. I began to sink into the booth a bit as the thoughts weighed heavily on my mind. But I had another question I wanted to ask.

  “So you said you were a dragon? A powerful, magic dragon, capable of many things?”

  “Yeah?” she responded quizzically, unsure of where I was going with this.

  “If you are so powerful, why can’t you just do things yourself? You know, use the magic to hide yourself while you do things, and then sneak away when it’s over?”

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  She sighs a heavy sigh, and leans forward in her seat. “I release a pretty potent… Let’s call it a scent, when I use my abilities. Any dragon worth their salt would know if they were within a mile of me. The government, some criminal organizations, you name it, they probably have a greater or lesser dragon in their ranks. I’d be found immediately. I could only perform the ritual with you because my apothecary has layers upon layers of protections that hide that scent. It is one of the only places in the world where I can use my magic and not be seen.”

  I thought about how frustrating and difficult that must be for her, to have all of this power and ability, and the desire to use it for good, and knowing that she couldn’t. The frustration of watching the world change around you, and knowing you had the power to mold it yourself, but being afraid to step into the light and risk everything to do so. I couldn’t imagine the sorrow in her heart as she sent her Champion out to help her achieve that goal, only for them to die; the responsibility she must feel for their lives, lost because she put them forward into the world stage. But something she said made me curious…

  “You said that your Champion died 17 years ago… They wouldn’t have had anything to do with the Central Park Incident, would they? My Dad was one of the first responders to the scene… He was killed by the Othersider that escaped that day.” I saw Silaqui shift nervously in her seat, but she did not answer. “My mother never talked about that day, probably because of how painful it was for her. I was only two, so I have no memory of it, but from what I learned later, it was a massacre caused by two warring factions of Othersiders fighting in the park. Did one of your Champions try to intervene?”

  Silaqui sat in silence, her brilliant eyes distant and lonely. Her hands were clasped in front of her mouth, almost as if in prayer, as she sat, pondering. I was about to speak, assure her she didn’t have to delve into things, before she spoke first.

  “One of the factions that day was my Champion and her crew. They had found out an Othersider was using their ability to manipulate people into following their rule in the park, and so they went to confront them, with some allies as distant backup in case things went wrong. I don’t know the details, as I wasn’t there, but things apparently went wrong, and… well, my Champion, Helena, was killed. She was only trying to do what I asked, to make the world a better place, and I led her and everyone that believed in her to their deaths.”

  Again, I grasped Silaqui’s hand, tightly this time. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Your Champion, Helena, didn’t either. You both wanted things to be better, and put your heart on the line for it. Just like my Dad. I don’t blame him for being there, for dying and leaving me and my Mom alone. I missed him like crazy, and I wished he could be there with us, but I knew he died trying to do the right thing. It’s how he lived his life, and how he wanted my mother and I to live ours. Helena was the same, and you aren’t at fault, Silaqui. I’m so sorry you lost your friend. I’m so sorry it took you so long to trust again. But I promise I’ll be careful. I promise I will hold on to you with all of my strength.”

  I locked eyes with Silaqui, and for the first time, saw a shimmering tear fall gracefully down her cheek. I felt the organ in my chest stir; even crying, she was beautiful. I slowly let go of her hand, and returned to my casual seated position, a soft smile on my face. This conversation was everything I’d wanted it to be. I felt a deep connection to Silaqui, a connection I hadn’t felt since my mother passed away; no, since before my mother had gotten sick in the first place. For the first time, I had someone I could rely on, and who I felt could rely on me. This feeling was a rush, a pleasure that flooded my spine with a joy incomparable. I think I was smiling, a large, beaming smile reflecting the warmth in my bones, because Silaqui returned a smile of her own, one that I wanted to sear into my brain, to retain for all time in a vault, so that when things were awful I could pull this image out and feel this warmth once more.

  “I will be your Champion, Silaqui. Thank you for trusting me. Thank you for guiding me when I was lost. Thank you for saving me, not just in that alley, but in my heart… I love you.”

  Wait, what did I just say? Fuck. I immediately started fumbling, trying to think of something to say to cover that awkward statement, but when I looked at Silaqui, she had a peaceful, reassuring smile that made the panic fade away.

  “You’re a weirdo,” she laughed, melting the tension that I felt. “But I want to thank you too, for letting me be part of your life, and for showing me that it is safe to trust again. I’m not comfortable using the ‘L’ word, but know that you make me feel safe and reassured, and that I am so gay for you. I have many… Well, let’s call them ‘partners’ right now, but it’s mostly physical. But, knowing that, would you want to be in a relationship with me?”

  Holy shit. I felt my heart: wow, my actual heart, pounding in my chest. I felt it again; it wasn’t just a foreign organ in a new body, it was my heart, true and proud, strongly declaring it was alive and well. It yearned for this, a connection with someone who truly cared about me. It felt strange; at first, I thought of Silaqui as a guiding figure, almost motherly, but she was just like me, a person trying to get by. I may be several hundred years younger, but she was honest and kind, and wouldn’t take advantage. I’d never been in a polyamorous relationship before though, but I imagined it would turn out okay; after all, love was love, and a person didn’t really belong to one person only. I imagined my parents and that whole generation of marriages and monogamous relationships being modeled to us; but I was already so vastly different from them that this jump to a different relationship model seemed like nothing compared to what I had already done.

  “I would like nothing more,” I said, taking her hand in mine once again.